The Bitter Sugar Debate by Hansie Smit

I love this guest blog written by Hansie Smit. He originally posted it on Thought Leader.

At a kid’s party recently someone remarked how thin I looked. I told the lady I was following Tim Noakes’ low-carb-high-fat Banting diet. I told her I ate butter like it’s cheese. She gasped a little. I told her I cut sugar completely out of my diet, which made some of the guests stop their conversation and look up. Clearly they weren’t banting. I was surprised. I was under the impression the fad had swept the peninsula.

“No I don’t eat sugar,” I went on. “It burns my throat.”

A woman rolled her eyes and walked away. A heavy-set man with bad skin and a coke in his hand looked me straight in the face. “You know Tim Noakes is a hoax,” he said aggressively. “Why do you think Noakes rhymes with hoax?”

I was a little taken aback but thought I’d reply with a little venom of my own. “I don’t know why it rhymes, man. All I know is I don’t like sugar,” I said.

The kids were playing with a balloon lady inside having the time of their lives. The cake was almost finished and everyone had a sucker in their mouth. My nemesis continued his questioning.

“You probably think sugar is addictive like cocaine and heroin,” he said.

“I do as a matter of fact. I think it’s worse.” This set him off a little bit. I could tell by the twitching of his eye.

At that point the kids kicked it up a notch. Someone gave them whistles. A group of them were scaling a wall blowing on the whistles as hard as they could. My nemesis’s boy grabbed his dad’s leg and asked for a sip of coke. He pulled the kid’s head back and threw the coke straight down his throat. The kid just took it. Like a young bird.

“Well, I don’t agree with you,” he went on. “Unlike drugs, consumption of sugar does not produce any abnormal mental state or change in behavioural disposition,” he said quoting a line I’m pretty sure came from an article he read somewhere.

“It does in lab rats,” I said. I read the same article. “They tested it and the rats went positively ballistic.”

“Lab rats are only good for some experiments,” he shot back.

I was getting tired arguing. “What can I tell you, pal?” I said. “I’m off sugar and I feel great.”

My nemesis took a sip of his coke and looked into the distance over False Bay. He was simmering. I looked around at the party now in full swing. It was getting out of hand. A girl in spandex and a mask was wielding a balloon shaped like a sword. My nemesis’s boy gripped the pool railing with both hands and banged his head against it. Some parents got worried and started packing their stuff. Two kids impaled themselves on a fence post which sort of ended the party.

Our gracious hostess saw the guests off and returned to serve coffee and cookies to the bittereinders as a reward for staying late. I asked if she had some xylitol I could put in my coffee.

She didn’t.

If you enjoyed this post then read more from Hansie here and follow him on Twitter: @freehance.

You can also buy a copy of my book ‘Sugar Free: 8 weeks to freedom from Sugar and Carb addiction’ here.

Let us know your thoughts!

xxx Karen

One Response to “The Bitter Sugar Debate by Hansie Smit”

  1. lindieclaassens

    Hi Karen, I enjoyed the giggle. Kids eat what we give them. These party packs are terrible and parents waste so much money. At my four year old’s party this year I decided to only bake a special cake. Birthday cake in our house can still be bad, but no sweet packets. I did buy a packet of small box smarties and chomps. I opened it and left it on the table. When I was tiding up, the smarties and chomps were still there. I have seen the light recently at another birthday party. The mommy had so much food and sweets and wasted so much money. I actually felt bad for not eating everything. So my conclusion is, you do not have to cater so much. Rather have activities and fun things to do at the party. For little ones a party is about having fun and not throwing up in the evening.

    Reply

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